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Your city has decide to build a statue or monument to honor a famous person in your country. Who would you choose?
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1. I'll choose Ban Gi 2. Mun person. Because he is 3. a 4. UN president and he is 5. a first 6. UN president in korea. However, 7. buliding 8. statue is very expensive and difficult. But if I bulid his statue, people must respect 9. to him. So people spend money to see 10. him, I earn much money. Still I'll use that money for good 11. works. For instance, I'll help the poor people, give much money to my parents, and contribute for my nation. Therefore, 12. that 13. is very nice 14. choosing. Another reason is 15. our nation 16. don't have a Ban Gi Mun statue.
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Spelling/öÀÚ 7. buliding : building | ||
Grammar_Articles(the, a or an)/°ü»ç 3. a : the 5. a : the 8. statue : a statue | ||
Grammar_Prepositions(on, at, from, by, to.....)/ÀüÄ¡»ç 9. to him : him | ||
Grammar_Conjunction(and, but)/Á¢¼Ó»ç | ||
Grammar_Capitalization/´ë¼Ò¹®ÀÚ | ||
Grammar_Conjugation/µ¿»çº¯ÈÈ°¿ë 13. is : are 16. don't : doesn't | ||
Grammar_Punctuation/ºÎÈ£»ç¿ë | ||
Essay Format_Sentence Structure/¹®ÀåÀÇ ±¸¼º 2. Mun person. Because : Mun because 4. UN president : Secretary-General of the UN 6. UN president in korea : Korean UN Secretary-General 10. him, I : him and I 15. our : that our | ||
Essay Format_inappropriate Words/´Ü¾î»ç¿ë ÀûÀý¼º 1. I'll : I'd 11. works : work 12. that : those 14. choosing. : choices. |
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Hello there! Your details are relevant and quite informative since you have stated who you'd choose and why. You were also able to give information about this person. You should just be able to add more details to supprot your opinion. Surely, you have more ideas. Also, try to develop your introduction and conclusion because they are brief. Then use transition words to logically organize all your details and make them flow smoothly. Avoid fragments and follow the subject-verb agreement (singular subject-singular verb). Capitalize proper nouns as well. You have the necessary details. Check the corrections though so you can avoid committing the same mistakes. Good luck next time