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아래의 컨텐츠는 초등학생이 직접 작성한 영어작문을 원어민 선생님이 실제로 첨삭지도 한 내용입니다.
또래 아이들의 영어작문 결과를 통해 내 아이 작문기초!! 살~작 엳보는 기회로 활용하세요.
같은주제로 내 아이에게 직접 써보게 하시는 것도 Writing 실력을 Up시키는 좋은 방법입니다.
[작문제목]
Is it better to research on the Internet or in books? Include specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
[학생작문]
I think researching in books is 1. better. Because when you research in books you could 2. know more better anwers. For 3. example 4. there if you want to know how you 5. eat in 6. the space there are two ways to search about it. First, you could search it on 7. internet. Second, you could search it in books. If you search it on 8. internet you could see 9. video about it and it is 10. easy. 11. But if you search it in the books it may take time but still you could 12. know better 13. informations about 14. it 15. and there is more you could 16. see it any where.
So, I think that searching in books is better than searching on 17. Internet.
[첨삭내용]
| Grammar_Articles(the, a or an)/관사 6. the space : space, Note: Add a comma. 7. internet : the Internet Note: Capitalize the noun. 8. internet : the Internet 9. video : a video 17. Internet : the Internet | ||
| Grammar_Prepositions(on, at, from, by, to.....)/전치사 | ||
| Grammar_Conjunction(and, but)/접속사 4. there if : if 11. But : However, Note: Add a comma. | ||
| Grammar_Capitalization/대소문자 15. and : And | ||
| Grammar_Conjugation/동사변화활용 5. eat : can eat | ||
| Grammar_Punctuation/부호사용 3. example : example, | ||
| Essay Format_Sentence Structure/문장의 구성 1. better. Because : better because 10. easy : easy to find this 16. see it any where : find out about it than anywhere else | ||
| Essay Format_inappropriate Words/단어사용 적절성 2. know more : get 12. know : gain 13. informations : information 14. it : the subject. Note: Add a period. |
[강사 Comments]
The article was well-constructed in most parts. Take note of a few articles (a, an, the) you need to insert (particularly before 'Internet'), noncount nouns like 'information' as it should not end with S, and some word choices. As for the content, bring in specific information that can give an explanation of your main idea. For example, if the main idea is searching in books can get us better information, name specific information we can get in books that we can't easily find in the Internet. You have the skill to write good sentences, so stretch your article and work on details that can make the article more fresh and engaging.
Keep expanding your vocabulary. We're looking forward to your future articles!
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